Dare to be YOU!
Introduction to Brandlady.com
Fearfully & Wonderfully Made.
At the tender age of eleven years a remark made by my mother engraved itself into my memory. It concerned a girl some six or so years older than I. Her parents sent her to boarding school and there the school kept her in the sixth grade until she left probably at the age of fifteen. What damage did this do to her spirit? How humiliated she must have been. My heart aches for her even now.
From the age of five or six an ugly scar on my spirit caused me to think of myself as dumb. It took until my mid fifties to recognise its presence and the effect it had on my achievements. I had no desire to achieve because of my fear of failure. These scars are like the gapping jaws of hungry wolves. The truth is they are lies. They hinder us from being the persons we were designed to be. These lies attach themselves while we are young and have insufficient understanding to rightly judge a situation. We believe only what we see and hear and do not question its validity.
In secondary school the powers that be graded me in the lowest classes. My siblings too suffered the same fate. Being the eldest I wondered if this had something to do with me.
At this time in a conversation with my peers, all of them graded in the lowest class, one girl told of a conversation between her dad and a friend of his. Lest I lay the blame where I shouldn’t I’ll say only this, the friend believed jealousy of the parent’s qualifications lay behind the child’s grading. In other words the offspring suffered the brunt of the jealousy. Whether right or wrong this too stuck in my mind.
At the fiftieth reunion of our class year, yes I’m an oldie, I learnt some exciting things about some of the victims of such treatment.
First Ann, who had not passed the Intermediate Certificate by the school’s grading, went on to do the Leaving Certificate (now Higher School Certificate) on her father’s insistence. When the results came out Ann had not passed. A short time later a notice in the paper said Ann’s papers had been re-read and she had passed. We learnt at the reunion from Ann how she studied as a mature student to become a teacher. During her teaching years she rose to the position of Headmistress. No child in her school would be graded a dunce I’ll warrant!
Another person, Sally left before the Leaving Certificate and took up nursing. She never looked back and became tops in her field.
A third person, Perdita didn’t pass the Intermediate Certificate so her parents took her out of school and gave her brother the opportunities instead. She says, “School itself represented homework that was never done, books that were always lost, and a constant sense of being regarded as stupid and inadequate.”
Eventually Perdita became a nurse and to her surprise never failed in her exams. She topped the state in Infant Welfare. She sums it up this way. “My children have followed similar patterns of mediocrity at school, with subsequent success in their chosen fields, so I have realised that school is a problem for many late maturers.”
I am thankful for Perdita’s frankness.
I still struggle with the belief that I am a dummy. But I’ve learnt this, where there is a desire there is the ability. It does amount to hard work though. Hard work, because anything you do requires hard work for one thing. The other thing about hard work is the constant battle to fight the lies from the scars on your spirit which attack you like poison darts and call you a dummy.
You were created with intelligence and you were made for a purpose. What is your heart’s desire? Set your mind to it and you can achieve anything.
Our society puts too much emphasis on education. Though education is important we are not its slaves.
Be what you were made to be. You can do it!
© Kathlyn Fauchon. November, 2008
Kathlyn Fauchon Kathlyn is a mother and a grandmother. She lives in retirement with her husband on the Central Coast of NSW Australia.
Kathlyn writes for www.4Him2U.com and also for www.peggyblannphifer.com